Four Things I Learned at an HR Conference
by Margie DuBois, CPC
May 1, 2024
In April, I attended the Workhuman Live conference in Austin, Texas. It was the first time I had traveled to an in-person professional development event since starting my business in 2020. A consulting friend of mine had invited me to the conference over coffee, mentioning that Brené Brown was a keynote speaker. I purchased my ticket and airfare the next day.
Headed to the event, I didn’t know what to expect. I had witnessed unfortunate changes in the conference and hospitality industries since the pandemic. On many occasions, I saw a decrease in the quality of experience, coupled with an increase in costs across the board. I was also coming out of a month-long stretch of travel, moving, and work fatigue.
Needless to say, my tank was nearing empty and I was a bit nervous. But I decided to trust my friend and remain cautiously optimistic while I sat on the plane.
. . .
It turns out my hopeful intentions paid off. The conference exceeded all of my expectations. It was masterfully curated, high quality, and well-run from start to finish. Of course, the awesome DJ, short walk from the hotel, great food, and top-notch speakers were huge perks.
But the best part of the conference was learning in community and in-person with kind, likeminded, and talented professionals. I was blown away by the caliber of humans at the event. As a solopreneur who has joy, community, and connection at the top of her core values, it was the bucket-filler I didn’t even know I needed.
During her keynote, Brené Brown was honest about the HR landscape and the role of HR professionals. She clarified that we are the “spacemakers.” We can help people own their choices that lead to their liberation and growth. Brown shared: “it’s not your job to clean up the messes for leaders who don’t know how to care for people.” Can I get an amen?
Needless to say, I did a lot of cheering during the Workhuman conference. Since then, I’ve texted with my new friends and reflected on the amazing knowledge and resources the speakers offered us.
Here are four meaningful insights I gained from my week in Austin, which were ultimately a combination of learning and relearning.
1 - Emotional regulation and communication resources are essential for the modern working world
As a coach and leadership consultant, when people reach out to me it is rarely about an employee’s level of competency. For the most part, employees come to work, do their jobs, and meet their deadlines. And they’re almost always described as well-intentioned. But the challenge on the table almost always boils down to employee behavior and communication.
This pattern was validated by Workhuman in nearly every session and keynote. For leaders and teams to thrive, organizations must dedicate their resources to helping employees improve their emotional intelligence and regulation skills. We must ask: how are people communicating and engaging with each other? How are they approaching conflict and personal growth? How are supervisors giving and asking for feedback?
It is my strong belief that if employers do not give their employees the proper training and mentorship surrounding emotional regulation and communication skills, teams will never thrive. And workplaces must dedicate themselves tirelessly to creating psychologically safe environments for this work to happen.
2 - Managers should want to become a manager before they’re promoted
Most of us know the classic research finding that people leave their managers, not companies. Of course, people leave both, but a bad manager is consistently cited as a major driver of employee disengagement and a lack of retention at nearly every workplace.
However, we have to take this finding a step further. Something people aren’t talking about enough in the HR space is the pattern of employees being promoted to management roles without careful consideration of their potential aptitude. We cannot skip this important step.
The reality is, not everyone is suited to be a people manager. And more importantly, not everyone wants to be a people manager. Some professionals have strengths that are much better suited to roles without a management component. Having expertise in a task or business operation does not equate to leading people.
Great managers must be genuinely committed to excellence in their field over time. Offering a humorous analogy, Brian Dorfler, head of human resources at NBCUniversal, remarked: “I’m not a good golfer because I don’t spend the time getting better at it. The same goes with managers.”
To ensure that great managers are developed, organizations must prioritize professional development training, establish clear cultural norms and expectations, and provide mentorship for their managers. The retention of your staff and health of your business depends on it.
3 - Fear culture and imposed expectations can stifle diversity and inclusion
I have the (perhaps) unpopular opinion that many organizations, while well-intentioned, approach DEI without the right strategy, expectations, or leadership. Some approach DEI as a box-checking activity, and hope that the perspectives and behaviors of their colleagues will change immediately when integrating the work. Teams feel disappointed when they don’t get the results they want, and in some cases, do more damage than good.
The reality is that imposed expectations do not work. Peter Danzig, psychotherapist and director of foundation culture at Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia, explained that from a psychological perspective, you cannot impose DEI culture shifts: “neurologically, it doesn’t work,” Danzig explained.
In addition, according to research done by Kincentric, one in three leaders are provided with meaningful opportunities to learn how to create an inclusive environment, and only 43 percent of leaders say they have someone to talk to about their own biases and experiences. This gets in the way of leading a diverse team and making change.
So, in order to move the needle on DEI over time, we need to connect in a human way, provide the right resources and spaces for courageous conversations, and identify the specific behaviors we want to see at work that foster inclusion. And when we do see those behaviors happen, we should recognize them in meaningful ways.
4 - An effective check-in meeting asks great questions and fosters healthy accountability
During Workhuman Live, I attended several sessions focused on courageous conversations and effective check-in meetings. It turns out that while some leaders spending sufficient time checking-in with their direct reports, most aren’t approaching conversations in a way that moves the needle on performance and gets the outcomes they are trying to achieve.
In The Power of the Check-In Conversation, keynote speaker, Jason Lauritsen, spoke about the value of a clarity check-in, where there is a key goal of alignment for the manager and employee. After explaining his four step process, Lauritsen emphasized: “This is not a big time suck - you have five minutes.”
During employee check-ins, the quality of questions (as opposed to the duration of the conversation) is key. Instead of just asking your teammate how they are doing, consider a scaling question (ex: rating on a scale of 1 to 10) where you receive a more specific answer from them and can celebrate wins and/or come up with solutions for any challenges.
Also, when having conversations about performance improvement, don’t just tell the employee your expectations - co-create the plan with them. At her session, Ending Exhausting Conversations, speaker Cy Wakeman suggested the bold questions of: “Where do you need to evolve next?" and "What [in you] needs to ‘die’ for you to move forward?” I am here for it.
. . .
So why was this HR conference so great?
In the end, it was all about the quality of the event, human connection, and learning. I couldn’t think of one day where I didn’t learn something valuable, meet a new and awesome friend, or feel satisfied with my participant experience.
On day one, at the beginning of her keynote, Brené Brown remarked: “human interaction raises the energy and productivity of the employee.” I believe the same goes for the human interaction that happened at Workhuman. I walked away feeling inspired, energized, and proud about the work I do. And you can’t put a price on that.
If you or your team is feeling overwhelmed by how to approach culture, management, and leadership at your organization, please know you aren’t alone. Don’t forget that you’re perfectly imperfect human beings doing the best you can with your current knowledge and resources. Don’t forget to ask for help.
About This Feature
Coaching Nuggets is a standing editorial feature in The Thirlby Co. Monthly Digest written by our company founder, Margie (Thirlby) DuBois, and occasional guest authors. Each nugget provides you with a quick read and resources to spark ideas and help you live your best life.
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