How to Deal With Your Pandemic Hangover
August 3, 2022
The other day I was catching up with a friend who I hadn’t connected with for a while. She asked me (via text) the standard catch-up question: “how have you been?”
I paused for a long time, and thought: I don’t even know how to answer that question anymore.
So I texted her: “I’m okay.” And then I proceeded to send her a six-minute iPhone audio message to update her on my life over the past two years, and explain what I meant by “okay.”
The truth is, every day this year has felt like a pandemic hangover. It’s like walking through a fog that won’t go away. Some days are mild and manageable, and others make me want to go into hermit mode, cry, and sit on my couch. In fact, I can’t think of one day this year where I didn’t feel some level of anxiety or exhaustion - even on the “good” days where I’ve had eight hours of sleep, spent time outside, and crushed it at work.
The impact of the pandemic on our mental, emotional, and physical health has been significant - and we still have more to uncover and learn. We’re in new territory, wandering up a mountain with a summit we have yet to reach.
In an August 2021 Washington Post article, authors Amy Cuddy and JillEllyn Riley shared newer psychological research on the human experience during the pandemic. Introducing the concept of pandemic flux syndrome, they reported that “many people are experiencing a starkly different set of feelings - blunted emotions, spikes in anxiety and depression, and a desire to drastically change something about their lives” (Source).
In addition to the flux syndrome, we are operating with very limited surge capacity - a term coined by Ann Masten, a psychologist and professor of child development at the University of Minnesota. Author Tara Haelle writes: “surge capacity is a collection of adaptive systems — mental and physical — that humans draw on for short-term survival in acutely stressful situations, such as natural disasters. But natural disasters occur over a short period, even if recovery is long. Pandemics are different — the disaster itself stretches out indefinitely” (Source).
In short: it’s harder to bounce back and adapt like we used to - and our human brains and bodies are not designed to go through this process to begin with. So if you’re still feeling burnt out, not like yourself, not as motivated, or simply down in the dumps, that is the norm. This time is incredibly challenging - even for the most resilient and positive people.
The bad news? There is no magic wand or roadmap for curing your pandemic hangover. You are going through a grieving and healing process that’s a marathon - not a sprint.
The good news? It is possible to take little steps that - over time - can create happiness and lead to transformation.
I have always loved the term quantum wellness, coined by author, Kathy Freston. In her book, she shares: “Quantum wellness, to me, is about the tiny little things that we invest our energy in every day and every moment. And the more we turn our attention to wellness, the more we stroke the fires of change. The momentum we generate through our actions leads, eventually, to a tipping point, and then there is a break-through, a quantum leap” (page 5).
Starting this month, consider investing your energy in smaller things that can lead to greater happiness over time. Here are seven ideas for dealing with your pandemic hangover:
1 - Talk to Someone
Seriously. You need to share how you’re feeling with others. It’s essential to your health and happiness. I believe that every human, regardless of their life experiences, should have a counselor. Going to a therapist doesn’t make you weak - it makes you wise and strong.
If you don’t have a counselor, go to Google and start researching therapists in your area, and then consider these tips for identifying someone who may be a good fit for you. Try out a session or two, and see how things go.
If you aren’t comfortable working with a counselor, consider working with a certified coach (I work with both). If you are unable to work with a counselor or coach, reach out to a trusted friend.
2 - Declutter Your Home
We know there can be many benefits to a decluttered home. When you get rid of things in your home that do not bring you joy, you (physically and energetically) free up room for things that do. This results in mental clarity, greater energy, and an ability to focus on other tasks that may require more focus - such as goal setting, budgeting, creative projects, or planning your next vacation.
But sometimes decluttering can feel overwhelming - especially at the beginning. Start small and plan a more gradual process by scheduling a few blocks of time throughout the month. Try your best to dispose of items responsibly, and research various options ahead of time (ex: Goodwill, emergency housing, pet shelters, recycling programs).
3 - Scale Back on That Vice
Most of us have a go-to food or substance that we over consume when we’re feeling stressed (hello, wine!). There is no shame in this, but challenges arise when we use that “thing” to numb our feelings or avoid addressing whatever situation we’re in.
This month, consider scaling back on wine, whiskey, potato chips, ice cream, coffee, or whatever that “thing” is for you. This will make you feel better physically, and allow you to become more aware of your thoughts and feelings in the moment.
4 - Take Up a New Hobby
While many of us are absolutely burnt out , another root cause of the pandemic hangover can be boredom. It’s easy to become creatures of habit and focus on a few things we enjoy. However, over time we can lose steam surrounding these activities when there is no longer a newness or variety.
This year, I made a bold leap to start learning golf. After an awesome event for women hosted by Huntington Bank, I ripped off the bandaid and signed up for private lessons. The process has pushed me completely out of my comfort zone and scared the crap out of me. It’s also given me something totally new to look forward to each week, and activated my brain and body in a new way. Totally worth it.
5 - Schedule Plans Just for You
This may seem like an obvious solution, but it’s something many people forget to do. Usually, the events that fill our calendars revolve around other people. We think we have exciting things to look forward to, but those weddings, family reunions, kid events, and work trips rarely charge our batteries. In fact - they usually zap our energy in the end.
Carve out time this week to plan a few events this year that you can look forward to. Make sure that these plans have you as the primary beneficiary. Whether it be a beach vacation, a sporting event, a reunion with a friend, or a wellness retreat, you’ll have something special to look forward to. Consider traveling to a city you’ve never been to, and indulging in yourself.
6 - Volunteer
Studies show that volunteering has countless benefits, including (but not limited to) improving mental health and providing a sense of purpose (Source). You meet incredible people, build your personal and professional networks, and learn more about yourself and the world around you.
Identify a focus area in the community that you really care about right now, and then start doing some research. This year I’ve found so much joy by giving my time to Salute Colorado, which empowers military veterans as they transition to the civilian sector.
7 - Get Goofy
If you’re in a big rut, there’s always the possibility that you’re not laughing enough. You may even be taking yourself a little too seriously - eek! This doesn’t mean that the challenges you’re dealing with are insignificant. But carving out time to play and laugh with those you love can be the most healing thing you do.
Not sure where to start? Check out these ideas.
. . .
As you work through your pandemic hangover, remember to recognize your hardships and the bright spots in your life. It’s okay to hold two competing thoughts at the same time. When you make progress, remember to celebrate the small wins and practice gratitude - this will fuel your continued success.
And don’t forget - ask for help when you need it. We are in this together.
Resources
Cuddy, A., Riley, J. (2021, August 11). Why this stage of the pandemic makes us so anxious. Washington Post.
Freston, Kathy. Quantum Wellness: A Practical and Spiritual Guide to Health and Happiness. Weinstein Books, 2008.
Haelle, Tara, (2020, August 16). Your ‘Surge Capacity’ Is Depleted — It’s Why You Feel Awful. Elemental.
